The Rocket Power Kids Must Be Fit

Indeed, I am about to ramble about that 90s Nickelodeon show “Rocket Power.” It was not one of my favorite shows, but I did see enough episodes that when I saw a rerun the other day on one of Nickelodeon’s off-shoot channels, it reminded me that the logic of the world was a bit different back then. Nowadays, kids’ programs are so tailored to fit in a modern world that is afraid kids will always take away a wrong message. However, in the 90s, or at least in the case of “Rocket Power,” writers just made a fun show. What kid wouldn’t want to watch a show about 4 youngsters living in California, participating in every sport imaginable, while also generally having very little adult supervision. It’s the greatest dream, or it was for 90s kids. I am here to say that this show definitely would not fit the bill today. Not just that there are not as many kids touching grass these days, but also that kids today are not as independent. Lack of adult supervision meant that kids had to find ways to entertain themselves while also staying out of trouble so the parents would never have to supervise. We did just this back then. We learned how not to get hurt, by getting hurt. We also probably put ourselves in very bad situations that our parents would have stopped us from. It taught us to be independent and think for ourselves. Wild plotlines aside, “Rocket Power” showcased this very well. Their father figure was very seldom around, so when there was a problem, the kids had to solve it. They also did a lot of dangerous things, but let’s be honest, they all were probably in really good shape, because sports. So, in the end, they were probably going to be okay no matter what. In any case, the differences in television back then and television now is glaringly obvious with a show like “Rocket Power.” Nowadays the show would be 4 kids with an iPad and adults in the next room. The one similarity that would remain is the punishment of washing endless dishes in our uncle’s restaurant. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Pleasing Our Parents

Growing up is a spectrum of emotions, challenges, accomplishments, and changes that is completely different for everyone. The one thing most of us have in common is different periods in our lives where pleasing our parents is the general focus. Now of course I mean no offense to anyone who lack parents, but even most of that group have a parental figure that still fits the bill when it comes to what I am talking about. When we are toddlers and small children, it is a joy to interact with our parents. We show them every stripe of Crayon, want their undivided attention, and inevitably ask them why at least a million times. Then we enter our teenage years and young adolescence and it seems like no matter how much our parents try to connect, they “just don’t get us” and we almost shut them out with a sign on our bedroom doors. However, the circle meets at the other end by the time we become a full-fledged adult. Then it becomes a race to see how successful we can become so we can visit for Thanksgiving and brag about our accomplishments to our parents. One kid becomes a doctor, while the other becomes a sports pro. The awkward middle child becomes a millionaire because everyone laughed when she bought some crypto using her college fund. Throughout it all, our parents stand by and watch as their kids go through this and do not seem to bat an eye when it all works out. I am not a parent, but I don’t think I could ever have that kind of patience, but then again, most people would say that forever is a long time. Besides that, it would make my parents overjoyed if I was to become a parent. It is part of the reason I am rambling about this now, because pleasing my parents is also on my bucket list. If only I could make them understand how hard it is to please my significant other. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

2.4 With a Job

A while ago, I was helping my cousin write a resume for a job she was applying for. Why I was chosen to help her still baffles me, because writing resumes is a chore no matter who you are. However, since I have taken a class on it, I guess, by default, I was the best option. Anyway, her goal was to get all the information about her on one page so that when turning it in, it was not a pamphlet for the employer to skim through. One thing I learned during my resume class, and knowledge I imparted on her, was that your GPA is not needed on a resume. This came as a shocker to the 4.0 genius cousin. She thought a resume was a list of accolades for a future employer to see so that they know how accomplished you are. Sadly, this is never the case. Employers don’t care how smart you are, they care how much experience you have. Things like prior customer service, time spent on a telephone explaining things to people, or even the ability to not puke if cleaning a bathroom. What is that old saying about “C’s get degrees?” In other words, even if you are a complete moron, can you get the job done without being babysat. Lest we forget that a barely C student has become president of the United States on more than one occasion. Needless to say, her resume was drastically shortened when her GPA, valedictorian-ship, and other grade-based information was removed. It was heartbreaking to have two pages worth of “study-time” relegated to a one page summary of all the volunteer work she had done. However, I encouraged her. She still was able to fill an entire page with summers and spring breaks spent running herself ragged to help people and organizations. This is what employers want. Go-getters with a mindset for proving yourself. In the end, I let her leave the fact that she was accepted into some pretty top-notch universities on her page. Hopefully she will look at this resume on her computer in the future and realize that a summer job was just a stepping stone to a very educated future full of financial security, even if her future employers don’t care about her extra credit GPA. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Let's Consult Our Handy-Dandy Socials

With the world at our fingertips sometimes we forget how far apart we still actually are. This is a concept that a lot of people come face-to-face with when using social media. They have “friends” all over the country, or even all over the world, and yet typing a message to them is the most they are able to do. It begs the question: for as many people as we claim to know, how many actual friends do we have? Moreover, for as much as we talk to people through these social media sites, how socially inept have we become? If I were to move into a shack in the woods and live for 10 years never speaking to other people, once I finally made it back into the population, I might seem a little socially awkward. It is something that has to be addressed when homeschooling a child. It is true that a parent may be able to teach their child everything it needs to know for college by the age of 10. However, without the social interactions of public school, that child may not develop socially the way it needs because you, and its siblings if applicable, are the only people it has interacted with. Being socially inept does not benefit the child, no matter how smart they are. And, sure, most children find social media by the time they are teens but learning social interaction via social media is akin to learning to play golf from video games. Even with virtual reality, the video game helps your avatar in so many minor ways that all you have to do is swing the controller and might even sink a hole-in-one. However, the subtle nuances of how to swing a golf club are not taught and it is nearly impossible to make the ball go where you want it, if you are able to hit it at all. When all you can do is type messages or send pictures to other users, you don’t learn the subtle nuances of social situations and therefore find it more difficult to interact in a socially vast world. It also must be noted that even if we have been out in the world, constant use of social media for all of our interactions can numb our social senses and make us more inept. All of this to say that social skills cannot be taught, they can only be learned and are necessary in a world of a social species such as ourselves. Making friends, job applications, gaining a significant other, and even just seeming relatively normal in society means learning those social skills from a young age and maintaining them through practice. The only way to truly learn them and practice them is to actually talk to people face-to-face. While there is nothing wrong with social media for a bit of fun, there is also great benefits from getting out in the world and enjoying the company of others. It is also a good idea to make sure the young ones don’t get on too early and that they are forced to leave socials once in a while to hang out with a friend or two. In the end, it all culminates to how difficult it can be to live in the modern world where, with one or two devices, we think ourselves to be sociable. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Having Scents While Being an Adult

At one time or another, someone else dictated what went on our bodies. Usually that would involve picking out our clothes for us, but they also dictated what we smelled like. As we got older, we generally found a style that worked for us and, for many, that style is still what is worn to this day, no matter how old. However, I think the decision of smells came with those choices as well. What I mean is, we also start to pick a scent that we want to smell like as an adult. Growing up most kids don’t think about scent too much, and, depending on what species of human you are, what you smelled like may not have mattered at all. For boys, it was a stink off until they reached the age where they realized their love interests preferred they smell good. For girls, it may have been the case that the newest perfumes by their favorite celebrity was what was important. However, by the time we reach adulthood, I think most adults find a preferred aroma that pleases them and sticks with it. Maybe it’s a coconut shampoo with a mint body wash and a nice smoky vanilla cologne or maybe it’s a strawberry hair spray with a misting of peaches and cream perfume. No matter what scent is chosen, I believe it is commonplace for an adult to pick the scents they want and not stray too far from that area. I say this because I find myself in this exact situation. I prefer certain scents over others and because of this I have been told that I have a signature scent. Personally, I think it is the sandalwood beard balm. I am also not saying this is the case for every person. For some, it may be a case of wearing what is cheapest. For others, they spritz on some of the newest bottle they received at Christmastime. Maybe one person likes a dozen different smells, so they have multiple scents. Just because you follow Tim Gunn’s rules of fashion doesn’t mean you have to make strict decisions on all your daily wears. Although, if you ask me, I think it is kind of nice to know that there could be a Jay Naus candle, and everyone would know exactly what it should smell like. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Talking Sexy...With Your Kids???

It is the most awkward time of a teenager’s life. They have out of control acne, their bodies are changing, and their parents want to talk about the birds and the bees. Or do they? For some parents this is not the routine. They assume their kids will just learn it as they go. Point blank, that is a horrible idea. The media and other easily acquired sources are not the right place to learn anything about sex. It overcomplicates a process that is relatively simple and completely natural for every human to experience or at least be curious about sometime in their life. The best thing to do as a parent is to get ahead of it so that your child is informed enough to make responsible decisions. So what age is appropriate to begin the learning process. The truth is you just have to know your own kid, because every brain is different and every child handles information at a different pace. (It is not always the girls that mature faster.) However, if your child is asking questions, then maybe it is time to start giving some answers. I mean be realistic. There is no good reason why you have to get into gory details with your second-grader. Just the basic facts are okay. It is also okay, if your child is asking where babies come from at a young age, to tell the little white lie of the stork. However, if your young one is headed off to college and they still think that every new mom got a delivery from a long-beaked bird, then maybe it’s time to sit them down. Also, if by the time your child is 14 or 15 they have not asked any questions, it might pay you to ask them a few questions. Because knowing what they know might help you start an open conversation about the ins-and-outs. As I said it is not going to be a comfortable conversation for either party, but what is more uncomfortable: a lengthy conversation about how a male’s and female’s parts work or having to admit that you became a grandparent at the ripe old age of 34. It will also be pretty embarrassing when your kid comes to you in tears because their partner broke up with them because they tried to stick it in an ear. For me the choice is a pretty easy one to make and I hope that all the parents out there make the right one. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

High School Sweethearts Gone Sour

Ah, young love. A thing that would make puppies envious. A time of buying small gifts with the little bit of allowance you scrape together and enjoying another person’s company. Until, of course you break up a week later because teenage hormones are wild. I think teenagers need to be given a reality check. Really it should be up to the parents, but sometimes they fall short, so it is up to the rest of the world to let teens know that your “first love” is sometimes just a crush and you will survive if it falls apart. Just because you saw a Hallmark movie where high school sweethearts got married and lived happily every after doesn’t mean that real life is going to reflect that. I don’t even care if your parents are the example you are following. The first person you have a relationship with is not always going to be the “said and done.” I used to be a substitute teacher and it was comically laughable how many of those teens would fight and argue over who was who’s beau. These same teens who had known each other for several years because they had gone to the same school all that time. Their hormones were confusing love for familiarity. Some of them had even lived next to each other for most of their lives. Of course you are falling in love with them; you know them better than everyone else. The ideal situation is that you will get to know several partners before choosing the right one. I mean how are you supposed to know what you really like in a partner, if you have only tried out one type. The world is a large place and there is someone for everyone. They may be a town over, two counties away, four states apart, or even separated by entire continents. I can’t guarantee that it will be an easy search to find that one, but I can guarantee that 95% of the population will not find their one true love sitting behind them in math class at the age of 15. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Age is Just a Number

Have you ever been in a situation where you are plenty old enough to be in that situation, but you wonder if mentally you really are? What I mean is, how old do you feel in your head? I am not just talking about that older generation that seems to never slow down. I am also talking about the generation coming into adulthood where it feels like we grow another year older, but our mentality in a lot of ways does not change. For instance, we have been grinding away at our fast-food job, that we have had for 5 years, and a job comes along that could be a career. A high-profile job where we actually have a lot of responsibility. We have certificates that say we are qualified and our interview went great. Then we get on the job and wonder how anyone could trust us with that much responsibility. Or we have a decent job and have saved every nickel and dime and then we are buying our first house. We will own something that is worth more than most of our other assets combined. Or even scarier: we have a child. We have to care for another human being. This is not a goldfish; it is a living, breathing human. To the rest of the world, we appear like an adult. We have responsibilities, daily lives, and common habits. However, we ponder if we are ready for any of “adulting.” In our heads, we are still texting with our friends until late in the night, knowing we have school tomorrow. We are still watching our Saturday morning cartoons and playing Pokémon. These are some personal real world examples and my only answer is that adulting is different than the adults in our youth made it look. We can be adults and still enjoy childhood things. What is that old saying about being young at heart. I guess as long as we don’t go through life sucking our thumbs, we can be as childlike as we want as long as the bills get paid. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Just Draw on Yourself with Crayon

Tattoos are kind of a big deal. There are those who really like them, and there are those who detest them with the utmost passion. The tattoo lovers claim it is an artform that uses the body. It is a means of expression like no other and for the majority of tattooed people, their tats represent a piece of themselves or something that is extremely important in their lives. The detractors see it as a permanent mark on the body that can never be removed. They claim it can damage skin, cost you job positions, and, if you follow the faith, you can never be buried in a Jewish cemetery. Now I personally do not have any tattoos, but I have done some research. While it is true about the burial situation most everything else, if done correctly is just totally false. That is not to say that it is not permanent. Because even the greatest of removal technology is not 100%. At best it drastically fades the tattoo, and it’s extremely painful. And yes, by definition, the artist is damaging the skin to inject the ink, but it heals. Also, there are a lot of good reasons that people want to get tattoos. A dead relative, a devoted lover, children’s birthdays, or a meaningful picture that is placed on the body are all great reasons. Getting drunk and getting a giant heart and the name of the stripper that night is not a good reason. It is also not wise to get a tattoo of foreign symbols and languages, because who knows what they actually mean. Furthermore, remembering that tattoos are not easily removed, getting an unsavory tattoo that might be regretted later is also not a good idea. But, to each their own. All that to say that tattoos are something that should not be done in the moment. They should be contemplated at length, properly planned for, and done safely with a reputable artist. However, what age is appropriate for tattoos? Is there an age that is too young? After all, parents can sign for someone under the legal age. Is there an age too old? Should someone have to sign for a geriatric person? These are the questions that need answered. For me, I don’t think tattoos will ever be a thing, but if someone is passionate enough to mark their body, then I think, within reason, there should not be an age limit, and no one else should have a say about the tattoo. Sure, it would be weird to have a toddler running around with a spiderweb tattooed on their elbow, and I don’t think grandma needs that teardrop beneath her eye, but any reasonable person with a reasonable piece of artwork or writing should have the right to display it as they please. And if, at the legal age of getting a tattoo, someone gets a tat, my advice is to get it in a place that can be covered so that crappy employers can’t say anything. Let’s be honest, it may be a fabulous job that you’re passing on over a tattoo and not everyone understands art. Then during your own time, show off that art all you want, just as long as showing it off doesn’t involve removing your pants to let people see a “warrior” tattoo that actually says “dirty boy”. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

It's That Time of the Month

Today, I want to talk about a subject that has a bleeding need to be talked about. A subject that many find disgusting and untoward to even mention. A thing, natural and healthy, but nevertheless seen as a lesser part of the human condition and something that has ostracized many of the female gender for centuries. If you guessed menstruation, then you are on par with me. If you guessed something else, then you may be a part of the problem. I have lived in a house with a sister and mom for two decades, and I have plenty of female friends and so often I have seen situations where no one wants to talk about periods. I have seen situations where the subject was avoided so much that the females around me were just seen as “a grumpy bitch” instead of people talking about what was really going on and trying to provide comfort for the person. And if you’re a female, you have probably heard any number of horror stories about how someone’s first period came and they didn’t know what was going on or it came and they weren’t ready. I as a male cannot believe some of the stories, but if I were a female, it would slightly terrify me. But that is not what this ramble is about. No. This ramble is about normalizing periods. Let’s talk about them, and I mean everyone. Men, women, young adults, and definitely people who are in charge of other people. I’m looking at you teachers. You know the ones that won’t let a young teen use the restroom any time they need to. Of course they are taking their purse to the restroom, why is it a big deal. I am also looking at the single dads out there. Just because you don’t have the parts, doesn’t mean your daughter shouldn’t learn about what inevitably is going to be a part of her monthly routine. I can understand maybe you don’t want to learn THAT much about the female anatomy, although it can prove useful. It is still no excuse. Get a female you trust to have a talk with your daughter. They need to know this stuff. Because it can be embarrassing and even potentially unsafe if they don’t know how their systems work and they start using tampons and pads without guidance. And for the love of God, can we please stop being in that “go live in a hut for two weeks” mentality of the Salem Witch trials. Periods are a normal thing. They happen to most every female and it is a perfectly healthy process the female body goes through. There is no need to shame someone for something they cannot control, and sometimes the “period control” products out there are useless, dangerous, and even painful by some anecdotes. Personally, I think if we normalize such a “vulgar” process then society as a whole can become a much better place to exist in. Period. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Helicopter Parents - This One's For You

There is nothing that grinds my gears more than watching a child’s formative years be burned away by a hovering parent that doesn’t know when to step back. As a victim of that type of parenting, let me tell you, it is not conducive to a productive young individual. If a child never has any small freedoms during that time when they are supposed to be growing up and learning what it means to be an adult, how are they supposed to know what they can and cannot physically, mentally, and willfully do. For instance, if a teenager wants to go to the movies on a weekend with some friends and, as the taxi driver, which is all you should be, you decide to watch the movie with them, how is that teenager supposed to learn what kind of person they are when they are by themselves. Leave the kid alone. Let them be them, by themselves, with their friends. Another great example is giving a teen some small tasks to handle on their own. This is not always looked at as a freedom, but it really is. Think about it. They are “free” to do a task without being micromanaged. The parent is giving them the freedom to do the task how they think it needs done and the only input they get is the final “okay” or “try again” from the parent. This is formative in helping a young adult learn how to work a job. They are not always micromanaged at a job. They are given the task to be completed and then the manager decides if it is good enough. If the teen never learns to think on their own, because the parent is there walking them through every step, then the teen never gets the hang of doing a job by themselves. This can easily get them fired. It is really simple advice helicopter parents – if your child is around 11 to 16 years old, they need to start learning what it means to be a person standing on their own two feet. It is the only true way to grow into an adult. Because there may come a time where mommy or daddy isn’t standing there ready to fix what’s broken. So let them go to the movies by themselves. Then they can decide what they want to watch and how it affects them. Let them decide when bedtime is. I know as an adult, I go to bed at a decent hour, so that I can get up and be productive the next day. Let them do the chores their way. You may not always agree with how it got done, but maybe, in the end, the final result was good enough. Overall, the role of a parent is to teach kids how to be an adult and this cannot be done if a few small freedoms aren’t allowed to creep in to the day-to-day routine. Eventually your kid will start to volunteer to be independent. Just remember they will be fine, even if the helicopter takes off. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Cursing Isn't For the Young at Heart

Have you ever said a curse word as an adult and had people stare at you like you just committed murder? I certainly have. I was this many days old when I realized that my parents still aren’t comfortable with me cursing. I mean if I was 4 or maybe even 14, I could understand the odd looks, but at the ripe old age of 28, I think I have lived enough life to have earned the right to say whatever I damn well please. Now that is not to say that every adult has to populate their vocabulary with “sentence enhancers”, but it does mean that if they want to, no one has the right to judge them for it. It also leads to the question, how old is old enough to curse without judgement? I mean if a parent was allowing their preteen child to run around saying f**k every third word, one may start to wonder if that child needed some intervening. However, I think there also needs to be a social contract with every parent and child that when that child reaches a certain age, they should be allowed to start peppering in a few curse words if the moment seems right. Because let’s be honest, if you are in your 30’s and you bang your knee on a just slightly too long coffee table and the first thing out of your mouth is “Oh fiddlesticks”, I am definitely going to wonder if you’re sane. In a situation like that, I should want to cover the younger people’s ears, not laugh at your mild expression of pain. And I think that is the main problem with my relationship with my parents. That social contract was never established. We never really talked about cursing. When I was child, my parents told me that those words were off limits and I shouldn’t say them at all. That was it. There was never a moment where my ma and pa said, “Son, you are 21 now and we are going to take you for your first drink and a good cursing.” I had been cursing to myself and my close friends for years before my parents heard my first curse. So, in my mind, because those people were okay with it, I thought my parents would be. That is not say they aren’t okay with it; I just think it took them by surprise. So, to all those parents out there, with children of any age, just like a sex talk, let’s establish an age where if your child wishes to become the sailor that many adults do, they know that you fully approve. Or establish a contract that you don’t curse, so they don’t curse, at least in front of you. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Cell Phones for Infants

 Is it just me or is the average age of a cell phone user getting younger and younger. I mean I have seen toddlers still in diapers watching a smart phone bigger than they are. It raises the question though, how young is too young for a cell phone? Does being able to operate one make you eligible to have one. Because in this technology age, younger and younger people are becoming literate in technology. There are 4-year-olds that can type numbers and call someone, but does this make them mature enough to be doing those things. Should maturity even be a factor? After all, there are 30-somethings that are not mature enough to own a phone and use it properly. In saying that, does proper use come into play? People of any age can use their parents’ phone to accidently order things online or dial a wrong number. I mean I would not find it far-fetched if a toddler dialed the wrong number and had a complete conversation with a total stranger. How long before we are literally seeing a scene from “Look Who’s Talking”? I feel there are a lot of factors that have to be weighed before anyone gets a phone. For me, I don’t see anyone under the age of ten with a cellphone, and, even then, there are many questions that have to be answered before the phone company sends the box in the mail. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.