Merry FestiKwanYuleHanamas

Holiday greetings and gay, happy meetings when friends come to call. Words of a carol have never rung so hard. The issue comes when people get so disheveled at what a holiday greeting should be. My family is bad for this. To my parents, it is “Merry Christmas” or nothing. They absolutely despise the idea of saying “Seasons Greetings” or “Happy Holidays.” I then have to explain that it is something most companies do as a measure to not offend anyone. Which is where my ramble starts. Why do we have to worry about offending people with a holiday greeting. I think everyone should say their holiday greeting, whatever that should be. If I say “Merry Christmas” to you, then by all means say “Happy Kwanzaa” back to me. I will take no offense because you did not wish me my holiday be happy. In the same sense, you should not feel upset because I do not know what you celebrate. Honestly, we all need to settle down about how we send cheer. It is not about religion or freedoms of speech or any other thing like that. It is simply one person trying to make another person’s day a little better by passing on festive spirit, because the holidays is no time for downtrodden feelings. So, to all my ramble readers, may your days be merry, may your candles burn all 8 days, may your ancestors get much gratitude, may your log stay hot, and may your pole stay silver. This year lets all have a great holiday, greeting people with a gay, happy smile. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

It Is Not About Neo-Dystopian Outlaws

Have you ever seen a movie with a friend and gotten into a hot debate about what the movie was actually about? Is your friend one of those people who over-analyzes every scene in a way that makes it nearly impossible to enjoy said movie? Welcome to my life. A life full of watching movies alone, because I have more than one friend like this. Long gone are the days of simply enjoying a movie for what it is. Unfortunately, I have a friend group that actively try to get their rotten tomato basket full as they decide what movies are actually about. The Barbie movie was a woman empowerment movie that spelled out how bad it can get if we ignore the signs of sexism. The Rise of Skywalker was about overcoming inner darkness and how we choose our identity. I remember one time trying to have a conversation about what a great movie The Fifth Element was, only to be told that the movie was actually a view on a dystopian future where the female has become a true object of sex and the only real masculine character was Bruce Willis as Corben Dallas. Now don’t misunderstand me, some of this is probably true. Moreover, what is a great movie without a little subtext of one theme or another, but does every movie have to be analyzed to death. What is wrong with just enjoying a movie for what it is, a piece of cinema. We are not in English class folks. We can watch a movie, enjoy what we saw and heard, and move on. What’s worse is when you have a friend who clearly has a bias and tries to make their bias seem correct for every film they see. The inequality of people of different race, gender, faith, and social class is something that everyone should be aware of, but if you expect me to feel this sense of inequality in The Secret Life of Pets, you are crazy. I am a movie buff. It brings me great pleasure to sit for a solid 2 or 3 hours and gnaw a bucket of popcorn, but I refuse to have a lengthy discussion about how deep Meet Dave gets. For me, I just like any movie Eddie Murphy plays in. In the end, I guess the aliens in control of my body need to learn how to overanalyze movies instead of just having opinions about random subjects. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.

Turkey Companies Cashing In

If you are like me, food shopping for the holidays is always a tear-jerking, soul-smashing, pocket-destroying mess of a time. Every year to prep for Turkey Day and Christmas, a massive grocery list is made so that we can get everything we need for said holidays. Then, as we are packing it into our freezers and refrigerators, I look at the receipt and nearly have a heart attack at how much was actually spent. Food prices are crazy! I understand it is impossible to buy an entire Thanksgiving meal with $10, but it amazes me that turkey companies are able to sleep at night for the price of some of this meat. Even the “knock-off” turkey brands are steeper than I feel they should be. My family usually enjoys a ham at Christmas, but those aren’t cheaper either. Honestly, it would just be easier to make all the sides and go meatless for the holidays. Rolls, green bean casserole, mashed potatoes, cranberry sauce, pumpkin pie; who would even miss the turkey. I see now why Charlie Brown’s crew ate popcorn, jelly beans, pretzel sticks, and toast. Their allowance just would not cover the cost. The worst part is, the meat companies don’t care in the slightest. Instead of trying to find a way to make it cheaper for the farmers to provide their meat, thereby making the market price lower, they just “adjust for inflation” and watch us buy it anyway. If a meatless holiday boycott is what it takes for these companies to realize we are sick of their wild price race, then so be it. Besides, kids will definitely eat their veggies if they are smothered in gravy. But that is just one man’s opinion. Thanks for listening to me ramble. I appreciate it. See you next time.